Holiday Hypocrisy (Lifehacking at 50+)

We weren’t much help to the neighbors when they asked for a hand putting up the Hallowe’en decorations. We’re not big on decorations anyway (more about that at Christmas) but we were really more of a hindrance in the black-cat-and-ghost department.
They wanted to put up one of those “Witch hitting a telephone pole” vignettes. With the four of us adults working on it, however, the end product looked more like the lead character from Wicked doing a pole dance. In the end, we posed the witch on her broom alongside the pole, sort of riding sidesaddle. But she still had the pole-dance smile.
I remember years ago, when I worked for a television station in another city, getting a phone call from a viewer who wanted us to remove our “Happy Hallowe’en” greeting from the air.
“Why?” I asked.
“Because it celebrates death,” she replied.
“It’s a 10-second message that says ‘Happy Hallowe’en,’” I explained.
“Hallowe’en is pagan,” she went on. “I’m a Christian and I demand—“
“The Church co-opted Hallowe’en from the pagans,” I began. “So, I hope you don’t have a Christmas tree at Christmas, because that’s a pagan symbol. And I guess you don’t celebrate Easter. The very name, Easter, comes from a pagan goddess. Easter eggs? Pagan. Holly and ivy? Pagan. Hallowe’en? Short for ‘All Hallows Even’, a church holiday.”
She hung up on me. Can’t imagine why.
I’m pleased to be in New Mexico now, where Hallowe’en is celebrated openly and without abandon.
Celebrate it, or don’t. But don’t be a flippin’ hypocrite.